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 | Fixture Details | |  | | |
Home | Return to Division Fixtures
| Nom | Home Player | Nom | Away Player | Result | Games |
| 1 | King Lewy | 1 | Mo Mowlam | 3 | 0 | 9/5 9/1 9/5 | | 4 | Captain | 2 | Hoodie (Lamprell) | 0 | 3 | 8/10 1/9 5/9 | | 5 | Dutch Prodigy | 4 | Tony Rake | 3 | 1 | 9/6 8/10 9/6 9/4 | | 11 | Big Andy | 9 | Taleb (not original) | 1 | 3 | 5/9 3/9 9/6 2/9 | | | | 11 | BBGB | 0 | 3 | Walk Over | | | | | | | | | | | Games: | 7 | 10 | |
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| | | Bonus: | 0 | 5 | |
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| | | Result: | 7 | 15 | |
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| Report: | CASCADES SEND BCC CASCADING DOWN THE LEAGUE
Good job BCC have already secured their 1st division status. This was their 7th defeat in 8 games, their only win being a walkover.
In their first encounter, BBGB was born. This match was eagerly awaited by BBGB as he wanted to get revenge for his name by rinsing the bar bill.
BBGB arrived early, pumped up for the match. He wanted to get on first (to get to the bar early?), as he had to rush off early.
He took his name too seriously though and turned up in a tight black t-shirt, and the shortest black shorts you have ever seen. "Where's the good looking bloke I played last time?" he bellowed.
"You didn't play me last time" captain replied.
Unfortuneatly for BBGB, The Student has decided to stop playing squash for a while. He wants to concentrate on his studies and drinking.
BBGB had to play newcomer Jeremy Tucker. An ex Essex county player new to the area, and a valuable addition to the squad. He was registered just before the midnight deadline with Gary Barrett.
However eagle eyed Gary noticed that Jeremy had already played a match for Acacia Hall early on in the season, so he was ineligible (where's the bloody spell checker) to play for BCC.
Captain was informed too late, so Jeremy still played BBGB, although the result was irrelavant.
Jeremy showed class in despatching of BBGB in 3 quick games, with an array of Ronaldinho type trick shots, and deft drops. (I just hope he doesn't coach these shots to his young students)
Jeremys' reply "You can't teach those shots, you're just born with it".
Anyway BBGB thoroghly (where's the bloody spell checker) enjoyed his tough examination, and was pleased that there wasn't a lot of No.5 in the league who played like Jeremy.
Afterwards he was informed that the result had been irrelevant. "You give me dodgy names over the internet, you question my sexuality, and then you give me a hard match that doesn't even count. You Bitch, I'm off!" (The bar bill was halfed with that tantrum)
Captain vs Hoodie
He either takes a % of the squash income, or he just loves the club so much. What else can explain Captains' total dedication to the team, when he loses 3 - 0 every week?
In the first game, it was close, Captain was playing really well, and Hoodie was making unforced errors. Captain took a shock 7 - 4 lead, and even had game point at 8 - 7, however Hoodie dug deep and took the game 10 - 8.
Hoodie changed his tactics in the 2nd and adopted a Clive London approach. He slowed the game down totally and began lobbing the ball around, forcing Captain to cover every inch of the court. Hoodie took the game emphatically 9 - 1.
In the 3rd Hoodie kept his new tactic going. Captain battled for every point, and kept the game close early on. One long rally saw Hoodie show boating, lobbing the ball around like he was giving a coaching lesson. However he tinned an easy drop.. "Ha - Ha" shouted Captain. That'll teach him to show off. On the next point Hoodie sunk a cross court dead nick off the serve. That'll teach him to laugh.
Hoodie ran out a 9 - 5 winner in the third, and gave Cascades a shock 2 - 0 lead.
Afterwards Captain said that he thought he had played well. King Lewy and Big Andy both said that he had played rubbish again. Cheers TeamMates!
Dutch Prodigy Vs Tony Rake.
Earlier on in the season Tony had beaten Dutch Prodigy. Dutch Prodigy wanted revenge this time round.
Giving up football, and spending more time on the court paid dividends in the first game. Dutch Prodigy took an early lead, and despite a slight wobble towards the end took the game 9 - 6.
The 2nd game was a humdinger. Long rallies, great retrieving, tight lengths, dodgy marking, cries of anguish, gosh this game had it all. It was nip and tuck all the way, Tony thought he had won the game at 8 - 7 when he stopped mid rally thinking the ball was down. The marker rightly called it up, and Dutch Prodigy forced it to 8 - 8. However Tony used his experience to take the 2nd 10 - 8
The game had 10 - 9 in the 5th written all over it. The 3rd was close all the way, with neither player gaining the upper hand. However, Dutch Prodigys' more consistent play helped him take the 3rd 9 - 6.
In the 4th however, Tony had a streak of bad luck, and also made some unforced errors. This wound him up a lot, he nearly broke his racquet at one stage. Ducth Prodigy kept calm under pressure and won 9 - 4, and 3 - 1.
Great win for Michel who got his revenge for his defeat earlier on in the season.
King Lewy Vs Mo Mowlam
Captain never saw this game (NO pun intended) as he was marking Dutch Prodigy, but the word on the street was that this was going to be a tight battle. The early exchanges did nothing to diminish this myth.
King Lewy looked sluggish to start with (he had just come back from a skiing week), whilst Mo looked like he was enjoying his squash again.
However in the 1st game at about 5 - 5, King Lewy accidently caught Mo in the eye, knocking his contact lense out. Mo had clearly been scratched on the eye, and found it hard to adjust. Afterwards, the resident medical doctor diagnosed that Mo was unable to see out of his left eye. This clearly affected the match and King Lewy ran out an easy 3 - 0 winner.
Matches all square at 2 - 2. Down to Big Andy to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat.
Big Andy Vs A Taleb (Not The Original One)
Ash began the 1st game scuurying around, hitting the ball at 100mph all over the place, (he was like Tony Hall on speed) Big Andy couldn't cope and struggled to adapt to his unorthodox style. Ash raced into a 2 - 0 lead.
Despite constant heckling from Hoodie, and stupid marking by King Lewy, Big Andy fought back and took the 3rd. Was an upset on the cards? (Well you already know the answer to that, the clues in the headline)
Big Andy lost focus ( a bit like Mo... Ha - Ha), and Ash stormed ahead and took the 4th game handing Cascades their 4th win on the trot.
A remarkble turn around for a team who looked destined for relegation at one stage.
A tough pill to swallow for BCC. A home win would have been a nice way to end the season. Unfortuneatly due to a Technicallity in the rules, a walkover at 5 was given to Cascades.
That's the last time I offer any help to Gary Barrett! And don't pinch any of my Headlines!
Ta - Ta
Ian McMeckan (Captain, Editor, Organisor, Treasurer, Physio, Medical Doctor etc) |
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| Author: | Captain |
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