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Home | Return to Division Fixtures
| Nom | Home Player | Nom | Away Player | Result | Games |
| 1 | Chris Sayer | 2 | Simon Joyce | 3 | 0 | 9/0 9/3 9/1 | | 2 | PJ Rutherford | 3 | Ian Smith | 1 | 3 | 9/2 5/9 6/9 9/10 | | 3 | Jerry Staffurth | 4 | Pete Ray | 3 | 2 | 4/9 3/9 9/1 9/3 9/4 | | 4 | Gary Mitchell | 5 | Geoff McMullan | 3 | 2 | 5/9 10/9 9/7 9/10 9/4 | | 5 | Mark Fleming | 7 | Cath Ruffle | 3 | 0 | 9/0 9/5 9/3 | | | | | | | | | | | Games: | 13 | 7 | |
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| | | Bonus: | 5 | 0 | |
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| | | Result: | 18 | 7 | |
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| Report: | First of all an apology – Ian Smith is not ‘a 49 year old unknown’ as reported here earlier, even though he did beat hitherto invincible PJ Rutherford. (Please call off the lawyers, Ian – or better still, ask your team scribe for a match report).
A tough report to write this week. Not much squash. All the memorable events were in between rallies and after the matches.
In reverse order – the three gentlemen and a little lady went about their business in a courteous and pleasant manner. Mark Fleming (big knee bandage) played exquisite shots, as only he can, with barely one error, to beat Cath Ruffle (little knee plaster) 3-0. Chris Sayer (hard hitter) beat Simon Joyce (not-quite-as-hard) 3-0.
Elsewhere, Jerry Staffurth had a gritty comeback from 0-2 against big Pete Ray (it’s my ‘T’, so please keep hitting it back to me in the middle). The turning point came at the end of the second game. Knole appointed a new team coach (CS volunteered), who advised Jerry to try using the walls. Instant results – 9/1; 9/3; 9/4 – 3-2 to Jerry.
At 4, the Battle of the Bulge – or was it two of the Tubbies (Tipsy and Ga-Ga) was close. Two 10/9s; the first ever backwards slide-on-a-bum pick-up; a debatably atrocious decision at match ball and lots of huffing and puffing. At times, with the two combatants in opposite corners of the court; neither anywhere near the ball, we could have been watching a boxing match. Even the marker was heard screaming quietly to his man to play the obvious shot into a vacant area half the size of the ring.
Gary won 3-2, having again appeared to be dead after the first game and a half. He just keeps on running.
The fight of the day turned out to be between one of the Knole ‘bankers’, PJ (I could have been number one) Rutherford and someone Knole had not met before in recorded history – Mr I. Smith.
Ian started in an old German national black and white shirt; PJ in one of his less pretentious black ones. The first game was quiet and the expected stroll for PJ. Then the unexpected happened; PJ started to lose. Mr Smith found a silky touch and kept nipping away. At least he did when there was any play. The longer the match went on, the more it looked like a debating society. Perhaps it was a mistake to ask a soft-spoken, mild-mannered (off the court) life member of Beckenham to mark this one on behalf of his adopted home club Knole. Divided loyalties – maybe a worse position than being biased?
Even the sight of Ian’s falling for the worst example of PJ’s ‘one shot’ (see report Acacia Hall v Knole Park 6/12/05) ever seen could not lighten the Knole supporters’ gloom. Three feet away when PJ struck the ball off the edge, the German sweeper ran a yard in the opposite direction - then collapsed in a heap of mock self-derision.
Two minutes delay near the end while it was established that game ball was about to be played – no reprieve for PJ. Then curtains for the Rutherford run.
General observation - New Priory rule required – time to be allowed between rallies for the over 50s, during which they can walk around in circles; kick or bounce the ball; pretend to look for the ball; chat to the gallery or abuse the marker?
Much debate afterwards about whose responsibility is misbehaviour (are the parents too soft, I ask?). Or should markers stamp on it straight away? Do the eight players who have finished have a right to ask for better entertainment – more squash; less bosh and tosh? Or when the gallery - and even the marker – start baying for their supper, have matters definitely gone too far?
All three close matches went ‘the right way’ in spite of the conflicts. That is not much of an excuse - more an indictment of the selection, training, regulation, and relative luck of markers and players. Perhaps it gets better in the higher reaches of amateur squash.
Another new Priory rule required perhaps – following sharing of costs etc. Where a home team already provides top-notch food with choice of puddings; serves and clears away same; and a free bar up until 10.00 p.m., they should not be expected to start serving alcoholic refreshments in the gallery during the match to induce their guests to mark difficult matches.
‘In his cups’ afterwards, PJ was heard to ask how Bexley 2s are doing (his erstwhile former teammates). ‘Not quite as well as they were’, came the reply. ‘Have they been calling you?’ ‘Not yet’.
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| Author: | John Creek (anon) |
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